I prefer an outside location against the base of a friendly tree or on a
deserted beach. Where I now live, I have access to a large shower with a
carpet and a big soft upholstered lounge chair that works well.
My greatest success happens during my moontime when I am menstruating.
At that time I feel a substantial quantitative increase in the internal heat
generated by this technique.
SEALING: To seal means to close the chakras (the energy centers of the aura)
and the body orifices, with a touch and a visualization. I lightly touch my
fingertips to the top of my head, forehead, eyes, nose, ears, mouth, throat,
between my breasts, solar plexus, genitals, anus and feet. With each touch I
visualize a circle closing, like the petals of a flower closing for the night.
I finish the seal by drawing a circle around myself. I pass my hands over my
heart center, over my head, along my body, under my feet, and back to my heart
center. At the same time I visualize a blue light trailing from my fingertips,
making a blue oval to enclose me.
When I seal before masturbating or making love, I feel an increase of
heat in my heart and genitals; and I don't feel tired or drained or lonely or
scared when I'm done - I feel warm and cherished, by myself or by my partner.
I also find that if I do not seal or protect myself during my moontime,
I experience a much more severe exhaustion after using this technique, a 'loss
of energy' similar to that which my partner describes when he ejaculates
frequently. I hear from a lot of Tantric writers that male bodies must
conserve their energy, but that female bodies may give endlessly; from my
experience I do not find that statement to be true. Female bodies also lose
BREATHING RHYTHMICALLY: I use a 6-3-6-3 pattern. I inhale for six heartbeats,
hold the air in my lungs for three heartbeats, exhale for six, and rest without
breathing for three. An easier and more common pattern is to inhale for four
beats and exhale four beats.
Whenever I do any kind of magic, I use this breath pattern, so for me
it's linked to feeling sacred and powerful. It also makes me breathe more
deeply, which relaxes me. Breathing meditation in general helps me clear my
mind. Later, there will be a time to generate images. For now, I want to
clear out extraneous material. I'm not going to think about the article I'm
writing or what I'm making for dinner. I'm going to make love to myself, and
only that. The breathing helps me to concentrate.
AUTOEROTIC STIMULATION: The first step in actually making self-love is to
stimulate myself and watch while I'm doing it. I'm not talking about just
stimulation of the clitoris (or penis) by hand - I rub my body against the
surface I'm on - earth or sand or soft cloth. I stroke the whole of my body,
and suck whatever I can comfortably reach with my mouth. The quality of this
touch is light, gentle and cherishing ... which doesn't mean that it isn't
passionate, only that it is not perfunctory or violent.
HEIGHTENED PLEASURE: Just before I climax, I stop. I visualize a column of
gold or white energy rising from my genitals to my heart center hot.
When I stop the physical stimulation just short of contraction, I get some of
the same effects as in full-orgasm. I feel sensation in my clitoris, a sense
of my body trembling slightly, a brief cessation of thought, and perhaps one
or two very small vaginal contractions. My partner experiences similar effects,
including penile contractions. However, I don't allow myself a full set of
contractions, and he doesn't allow himself ejaculation. We call this 'climax
without ejaculation' and 'climax without contractions.' (Obviously, our
language isn't set up to discuss this.)
This (hopefully specific) description does not convey the pleasure of the
experience. This is a smaller-scaled orgasm, not as intense or as
uncontrollable as a full orgasm, but still fun.
When I start a session, I require some stimulation and time to climax
(without contraction) the first three times. Thereafter, I experience a sort
of perpetual state of almost-climax (with contraction). I become very
physically quiet, limiting stimulation to clitoris only, and hit a series of
peaks of intense pleasure.
Parenthically, my partner reports a very recent experience. He's getting a
climax with partial ejaculation. He reports the sensations and penile
contractions are slightly less intense than all-out orgasm. The ejaculate is
a different color: clear, not white. There is no loss of erection or arousal.
We don't know what's going on here biologically. It is, at this point, an
The advantage of being able to make love while retaining a more or less
indefinite state of arousal is obvious. Tantric masturbation is a good place
to learn, where no one will be upset if you go over the edge, and where the
learning can progress more quickly because you're in complete control.
VISUALIZATION: The second stage of making love to myself is to generate
imagery. I close my eyes and lift my head so that my spine is
more or less straight. In my mind's eye, I see a column of gold or white light
rising from my genitals, along my spine, through the chakras, and out through
the top of my head to a globe two or three hand-widths above. At the same
time I feel an increase of internal heat where the column passes, until my
central body, from genitals to head, is a flame.
Some people refer to this as 'rousing Kundalini.' They visualize the flame
as a serpent raising its body. This is supposed to bring enlightenment.
It is also supposed to make the entire body shake uncontrollably, and to be
dangerous to do without the guidance of a master.
I experienced that kind of reaction once. It did frighten me. I stopped,
and it immediately went away. I have a friend who experienced this kind of
vibration in a chakra meditation and thought, 'Wonderful! I'm doing something
right.' So I think that what a guide might do is explain that the reaction is
normal and safe. This is useful to me, as I don't know any Tantric masters.
Most writers, however, say to go out and find yourself one.
Indian Tantric mythology talks about a dancer, Shiva, and his snake, Shakti.
They create the Universe. I know another myth: Eurynome, the Goddess, who
danced in The Void and formed Ophion, the Snake, from the wind. They created
the Universe also.
I use both images. The idea is to raise the Kundalini in my spine ( the
snake) up to my crown chakra (the dancer) and to unite them. The snake coils
around the dancer's legs, body, genitals, and chest, licking the dancer's face.
I imagine how a snake would feel coiled around my own body of light, slippery,
and moist with my sweat, undulating rhythmically.
Alternatively, I see a being of light whose outlines dissolve in radiance,
neither male nor female, remote from me, infinitely compassionate, with me and
yet apart, stretching hands out to almost touch me, imparting great love and